By Joe and Debra Gould
Please join Joe and Debra for an engaging conversation at STTC on www.Zoom.com every Tuesday @ 7:30PM CST for 25 minutes.
Mission: This program is about marriage relationships that works even through the challenge.
Purpose: STTC is really for anyone who wants or have a strong relationship. We talk about what can possibly create a strong and sustainable marriage and relationship that works. In addition, we ask for feedback from others on what works for them. Every week we will invite guests to join the program to share information about their relationships and listen to the engaging conversations.
We will have engaging conversations with our guests to share information on how they are making their love and marriage relationship work even through the challenge. What message can they share with others? What do they do to stay together during the tough times? The good times? We want to invite guests that will tell it like it is and keep it real from young to mature adults.
Building a strong relationship means not simply going through problems but growing through problems…..as your relationship grows you develop your strength through the challenge. Our relationship success comes from doing what other people unsuccessful relationships are not willing to do. We don’t wish it were better. We work on the possibility of a better relationship.
It was absolutely a great time to connect in an engaging conversation with couple friends that we highly respect and have known for many years. We consider them to be some wonderful people, couples to hang out and socialize with at events, friends helping each other, and a support system in our network.
Below are a few questions we talked about during our Tuesday night of September 5, 2017 STTC interview with friends.
2. Do you seek out to surround your marriage with good role models and couples who will keep you honest? (Milton and Sheila Brown)
Milton: Yes, we make it a point to surround our life with like-minded individuals that help us to grow as a couple.
Sheila: I prayed to God for this specific prayer many years ago to bring couples into our lives that are Christian people, kind, friendly and enjoy travelling. I can honestly for sure say we have found those friends and family members in our network and we have FUN together.
3. In your marriage relationship, “How do you agree to preserve peace and harmony in your home? (Ronald and Voris Vigee)
Ronald: Communication is the key. When we disagree as a couple, it is so important to address the concerns head on and talk it out.
Voris: I have learned that “Compromise” is #1 in the household. That’s what makes the peace and harmony that works all the time.
4. Is it easy to thank God for your partner every day? ALL Couples
Clinton: Exceptional easy to say that I thank God for Kelly. While I don’t get on my knees to pray and I pray in bed I’m thinking about how blessed I am to have her in my life. I was married once before and this time around I know it is a right fit for my life. Together we have a beautiful daughter we are so proud of and we are great together.
Kelly: As we are aging we are taking inventory of what we are grateful for in our lives. I’m thankful for Clinton and our family. Life is wonderful with him and yes, I thank God for him.
Milton: One couple pulling in a separate way is not going to make it at all. I can say we are going in the same direction both Milton and Sheila Brown. Thank God for blessing me with a loving wife and partner every day.
Sheila: Honestly and we are being open in this conversation. It is not easy every day. Every day I do it to say "I love you" to Milton Brown because I mean it from the bottom of my heart. My first marriage was very bad and I will leave it at that. There will be no other man after Mr. Milton Brown.
Ronald: I love everything about Voris. She is an incredible woman and I love her and adore our kids.
Voris: Nothing is easy. Everything in a marriage relationship requires work. I love my husband and so happy and proud to have our three kids we have together. Ronald is the love of my life.
Nancy J. Lewis, MS, SHRM-CP, PHR, RCC
Christmas is a time of love, joy, peace, and happiness. It brings to mind memories of family and friends from past days we have shared time with over eggnog and cookies. This year I challenge you to give the gift of yourself in creative ways. It is important not to stress out because you can’t give the gifts you desire to give. Give the gift of yourself because that’s the gift that means the most. Enjoy the eggnog, cookies, family gatherings, and the love that you feel from loved ones and friends, but don’t get consumed with feeling you have to buy something to make Christmas meaningful. The following tips are things you can do this Christmas season to bring a smile to the faces of family and friends.
These are just a few of the ideas you can use. The key factor to remember is give of yourself and when you do watching the smiles, hearing the laughter, and feeling the love that runs from heart to heart is priceless. Have a wonderful Christmas and a New Year filled with peace beyond measure, joy unspeakable, and love that fills your heart. Be
By Debra W. Gould, MS
Balancing work and personal demands is more challenging today than ever. Organizations are constantly focusing on how to improve production, profits and performance, while at the same time working to maintain a high level of morale. With no definitive parameters for measuring balance, perhaps the real goal should be personal and professional separation-as we explain in this blog.
Why separation is so important:
As technology has revolutionized the business landscape, many professionals no longer just leave their work at the office. This causes many people to feel they spend all their time working or on call, regardless of location. At the same time, many parents are prioritizing attendance at their kids' events and family dinners using the same technology within the time frames of "normal business hours." As a result, many people are doing two things at once-and doing neither very well. How many times have you been at a restaurant with your family and all attention is devoted to your smartphone? When your personal and professional lives overlap in this manner, both of them suffer.
At the office: Jobs frequently require people to work late, to put in extra hours and spend days on the road away from the family. This is because the job needs to get done, and a true professional understands they may have to miss a child's event or be away from home at inopportune times. To be great in business a person must make sacrifices.
At home: Most professionals today work to provide for their family, and feel their family or personal life is the most important thing to them. Moms want to be moms, dads want to be dads, and people want to be who they are other than what their business card states.
So how do you do both?
Be present at work: When a person is at work they need to be at work, no matter their family dynamics or problems-they must learn to leave them at home. The one thing that can make any family problem even more difficult is for that person to lose their job because their personal issues are affecting their performance.
Be present at home: When a person is home with their family they need to be present there. They should leave their phone and suit jacket at the door. Just like the company that pays that employee deserves the employee's very best, their families deserve their very best too.
Debra W. Gould, MS is the president of Debra Gould & Associates, Inc. based in New Orleans and provides management consulting and training services to commercial and government clients. Debra is one of the founders of The Ebony Speakers and co-author of the book, Real Women, Real Issues - Positive Collaborations For Business Success.
Debra can be reached at: (504) 244-6576
email: email@example.com and
By Michelle Porchia
I have an annual day called “Innergize Day.” It encourages people to take one day a year for themselves to do something they enjoy or rarely take time to do. The goal is that you will take a day a year, a day a month, and a few hours a week for yourself.
A few years ago, I attended a panel discussion comprised of women at the level of CEO. They talked about the importance of learning to unplug; they were reminded of this when their children started commenting about them conducting business on the phone while on vacation.
Lastly, there was an AT&T commercial where the child asked the mother when they could become a meeting. The commercial, of course, was about being able to work from anywhere when you have your phone. The message I took away was the child was asking for more time with the mother.
I recently spent 11 days in Italy. It was beautiful. The food and drink were amazing. I love Italy and would live there if I could. What I learned from this trip is that people really do have trouble unplugging. There were 13 of us as a group on this trip. I only used my phone to take pictures, and I didn’t take that many. I took magazines to read and my journal to write and reflect. Several people had their phones and tablets. They were taking pictures nonstop, and at dinner they would be on their phones and tablets uploading pictures to Facebook and sending pictures to family and friends. Some even took calls at the dinner table. I believe they missed experiencing the beauty of the moment. They missed out on truly tasting the savor of the many courses of authentic Italian food. And they missed out on interacting and getting to know others. Now, I’m an introvert but at dinner I had conversation with the people sitting around me.
After the first day, I didn’t miss being on Facebook or texting. I enjoyed being in the moment. We stayed at a bed and breakfast on the second leg of our trip. The hotel had a room that had a fireplace in it. When we returned from our day’s excursion, I would sit in the room and just enjoy the fireplace. Sometimes I would read a magazine or journal, but most of the time I was still and just looked at the fire.
Europeans take vacation every year and they do not work during their vacation. They enjoy their vacation, family and friends. We, as Americans, can learn from this. I remember on one of my corporate jobs my message said I was on vacation and would not be checking for messages. People left me a message saying a novel idea and then they left me the business message. They actually thought I was still going to check my messages even though I said I was on vacation and would not check for messages. Why? Because in that corporate culture people worked during their vacation. At another panel I attended, a male CEO said he was in Italy and his daughter looked at him when he took a call and said, “Really, Dad? You are going to take a call while we are here in Italy?” She shook her head and walked away. He didn’t take any more calls the rest of the trip.
Whether you have family or not, you need to unplug. You need to enjoy vacation, time at home, lunch (without working). If a business cannot run without you for 30 minutes, two days or a week, what does that say about the people you have chosen to be part of your business or what does it say about your leadership style?
I encourage you and challenge you to try to unplug. Start small. Take lunch and do not have your phone. See what happens.
Book Debra, Michelle, Nancy or Carole for your next speaking engagement or training event.